Rick Caldwell was always a voice in my head.
We met, in fact, for the first time over the phone. Waylaid by one of several adolescent surgeries to fuse the joints in his feet so he could walk, Rick was absent when my brother and I started attending Derry Street United Methodist in the mid ‘70s. After a couple of kids in the Youth Fellowship group told me Rick and I would probably make great friends, I called him.
“I hear we’re supposed to be friends,” I recall saying. That first conversation lasted over an hour.
Rick was the consummate nerd. Fantasy, sci-fi, superhero comics — he had them all. Bound by a genetic degenerate muscular disorder, Rick surrounded himself with books, and he was more than happy to share. Lord of the Rings, Stranger in a Strange Land, Conan the Barbarian, Elric, A Wizard of Earthsea, The Uncanny X-Men; if pulp fiction was a gateway drug, Rick was our gateway.
He introduced us to Dungeons & Dragons, for which I am eternally grateful.
Rick had a wild imagination and talent to match. His D&D maps were beautifully rendered, and his drawings of creatures we made up were in high demand. (That’s his self-portrait above, painted in college.) Even now, some five decades later, some of the encounters he DM’d are the stuff of legend within our circle of friends.
Although he was years older than most of us in the YF group, and ostensively the adult in the room, Rick’s impishness belied his maturity and mobility. He was an instigator and provocateur of pranks, easily convincing us younger kids to pull off the practical jokes he couldn’t. Smiling (don’t ask how he got that nickname) was fond of whispering to whoever was sitting next to him that he heard so-and-so was planning on giving them a wedgie and that they should strike first — then sit back and cackle as a scrum broke out.
If Smiling was limited on land, in the water he was unstoppable. The Caldwells had installed a pool in their backyard for Rick and his brother Dann to exercise, and it became our collective refuge over many summers. Fueled by teenaged energy, our pool fights were epic and unbridled; Rick was like a leviathan rising from the deep. His favorite tactic was to pop up suddenly and expertly spit a stream of water into his opponent’s eyes, blinding them and leaving them open to attack.
Rick breaching and deploying his patented pool fighting technique.
While Rick was able to walk with some difficulty, he frequently used a wheelchair to get around. Sometimes, especially at the Colonial Park Mall with its uneven undulating floor, I’d jump on the back and we would careen down the mall. Rick hated that lol. While his condition was immaterial to us, he wasn’t above using the wheelchair to his advantage. Once, at the opening night of Star Trek: The Motion Picture, a manager told Rick he could go to the front of the blocks-long line. Rick asked if he could bring along his friends. Best. Premier. Ever.
Long after we aged out of Youth Fellowship, long after we graduated high school, we still went to see movies on opening night and played games. The YF gamers merged with my gamer friends from school. We went on roadtrips. We argued about comics. We were in each others weddings.
Rick was always happy to playtest whatever I was trying to publish.
Even after I moved to another state, on visits back I carved out time to see these core friends. When The Lord of the Rings finally made it to the big screen, we set aside a whole day in 2002 to see a matinee of The Two Towers, and retire to Rick’s basement to play D&D into the night. Only years later did I realize this was the last time.
About a decade ago, Smiling had a stroke. That, combined with his life-long muscular dystrophy, set off a cascade of health setbacks. He never returned home. Eventually, he was moved to the nursing facility a few miles from his brother’s house.
I saw my friend a few times afterwards. Rick even got out on rare occasion, for a special dinner or a funeral. (Or opening weekend of Batman vs. Superman. No WAY he was going to miss that.) It became increasingly difficult to reach him though, as he faded wraithlike into oblivion.
Rick Caldwell died yesterday. He had no more saving throws to make. He was comfortable and surrounded by family & friends — apparently he even joked that everyone was acting like he was dying.
I was last supposed to visit Smiling in March 2020, the weekend the pandemic stopped everything. The nursing home had gone into immediate lockdown, so I left a message with his brother that just said “see you next time!” A day after I got home, I got a video call: Rick’s wife had gotten into the facility, suited up, and held up an iPad so Rick could FaceTime people. He was in surprisingly good spirits for it being the apocalypse and all.
We talked about movies and games, obviously, and other stupid stuff, and it occurred to me this might be our last conversation. I closed my eyes for a moment, heard the voice in my head as Rick cackled about something or other that amused him, and it was as if no time had passed at all.